I am a new member and just started reading all these notes today. the first thing that comes to mind is that you do care about yourself and others and is why you are sharing with the members of IDA. also, many of us have or will experience many of the same things you are. I also struggle with many of the things you refer to and have trouble dealing with it everyday, i go from blaming my parents, to my wife , to my kids and to my self and all back thru it again. what i have realized is that many people go thru this and that you must get it out and discuss with anybody willing to listen and not judge. as i have read many responses, you have plenty of people right hear that are willing to listen and offer their support. none of us are normal or perfect- what is normal and perfect ?? is it a perception that our society has created thru t.v./radio ?
life can be like fishing- somedays the fishing is great and your arms and back are sore from all the fish, other days the fish don’t bite, another day the boat motor won’t start and the trailer blew a tire. you don’t stop fishing because of the bad days, you continue fishing because of the good days. this is therapy for all of us !!!
keep on keeping on !!!!
erik