Ever see the movie Clockwork Orange, were they wire the guys eyes open? I double cut some insulation. When I pushed it in place at eye height a bunch of the cut fiberglass went into both eyes. Spent an hour in the ER with eyes wired open and liter after liter of fluid poring into my eyes.
That sounds awful. I feel for you. And on other note I thought I was the only one who’s ever watched that movie.
Last weekend I was removing an electrical start Merc from my old tiller boat. The electric start Switch and key is in a huge box that was routed through small holes in the sheet aluminum, so I had to take the motor end of the wires loose from the engine to back them through all these holes. There were many wires from the starter cable going to many very small and hidden locations in the engine. I spent the morning swearing like a truck driver trying to get my big fingers in all these tight little places and was especially mad at this large plastic deal that was always in the way. After a few hours, I finally had all the wires disconnected and pulled everything out of the boat only to realize the large plastic deal that had been my nemesis this whole time was actually a quick disconnect for the starter wiring…….
So last night about 8 p.m. the wife and i were watching tv, all the windows were open and a nice breeze coming through the living room. And then the house started to smell like smoke, i went out the back door to see who was burning what since you need a burn permit this time of year, didn’t see any smoke or smell much, so i came back in and continued watching My 600lb life ( keep in mind i’m banned from the remote sometimes). So after a while my wife says, who in the hell would be burning something this time of night, and i responded its “probably the jackasses down the hill burning their trash”, and she says “no it smells more like an electrical fire or plastic burning”. So she gets up,opens the front door and looks out, and yells, “the garage is on fire its coming from the garage”. So i flew off the couch, hurdled the coffee table and ran to open the garage door expecting the worst.
Low and behold, it was one of her 4ft flower pots that sit on each side of the garage on fire and smoldering. I then remembered i put my cigarette out in it 2-1/2 hrs earlier. Who in the hell would ever think potting soil was flammable.So after being called every stupid name in the book, and 5 gallons of water putting out the fire, i realized i at least saved myself the ass-chewing in 3 weeks when she found the butt while planting flowers.On a positive note she did say “I’ve never seen you move that fast in 20+ years, and my tough guy response was ” i was just getting out of he house since i knew it was on fire”
It’s amazing what you can put on your toothbrush when you’re still waking up.
I put Desitin on my toothbrush the other day…my diaper rash on my gums went away, however…That was the last time the FW put it right next to the toothpaste…
Not me but a buddy had 2 one gallon jugs setting on the stairway .One full of water for his Cpap and another full of Miracle Grow plant food . Not sure if he or his wife grabbed the Miracle Grow and filled his Cpap machine with it. Think he used it for several days before realizing what happened . He went doctor after the fact seems to be okay .
I put the dog food in my daughters cereal bowl, poured on the milk and served it to my daughter. The dogs got the cereal!
This past weekend boiling down the rest of the sap for “Syruping”, while sitting around drinking blue smoothies, I put the metal poker stick in the fire to turn it red hot (for kicks and giggles). I then proceeded to grab the metal post without any gloves on.. I let go quick, but not quick enough! And I now have a pretty good burn going across my palm.. 
It’s amazing what you can put on your toothbrush when you’re still waking up.
It’s amazing what you can put on your FW’s toothbrush when your still waking up. 
My two biggest stupid moments both involve trailers and what happened when someone distracted me during the routine processes. First one: Flipped up the latch on trailer and then backed the 4 wheeler off… when she came down the tongue went through the back window of the suburban. Second one: Arrive at campground, cracked a beer, level the 30′ travel trailer and then onhook it without choking the wheels… Thankfully she only rolled back about 10′ toward the river before stopping!
Not me but a buddy had 2 one gallon jugs setting on the stairway .One full of water for his Cpap and another full of Miracle Grow plant food . Not sure if he or his wife grabbed the Miracle Grow and filled his Cpap machine with it. Think he used it for several days before realizing what happened . He went doctor after the fact seems to be okay .
Poor guy is going to go through a lot of nose hair clippers.
<div class=”d4p-bbt-quote-title”>Don Meier wrote:</div>
Not me but a buddy had 2 one gallon jugs setting on the stairway .One full of water for his Cpap and another full of Miracle Grow plant food . Not sure if he or his wife grabbed the Miracle Grow and filled his Cpap machine with it. Think he used it for several days before realizing what happened . He went doctor after the fact seems to be okay .Poor guy is going to go through a lot of nose hair clippers.
Wife thought it worked on the garden cucumbers so why not try it on the husband.
Getting dressed in the darkness of early morning so as not to awaken my sleeping wife, I made my way to work only to find I was wearing one brown shoe and one black shoe.
Getting dressed in the darkness of early morning so as not to awaken my sleeping wife, I made my way to work only to find I was wearing one brown shoe and one black shoe.
Feel comfort in that mistake has likely been repeated 1000’s of times.
Getting dressed in the darkness of early morning so as not to awaken my sleeping wife, I made my way to work only to find I was wearing one brown shoe and one black shoe.
New fashion statement 
All the guys in your office will be doing that soon
I showed up to work today. LOL
I didn’t move South after last year’s April blizzard… because it would never happen again…
<div class=”d4p-bbt-quote-title”>Don Meier wrote:</div>
Not me but a buddy had 2 one gallon jugs setting on the stairway .One full of water for his Cpap and another full of Miracle Grow plant food . Not sure if he or his wife grabbed the Miracle Grow and filled his Cpap machine with it. Think he used it for several days before realizing what happened . He went doctor after the fact seems to be okay .Poor guy is going to go through a lot of nose hair clippers.
He was laughing about it when he told the story , he was hoping it would make something grow , if you know what i mean 
Just happened yesterday.
Had to fix the fan in a an air scrubber at work and used the phone for a flashlight. Got the scrubber fixed and put together. Boss called to see if I fixed the air scrubber. Phone was in the air scrubber.
Flipped up the latch on trailer and then backed the 4 wheeler off… when she came down the tongue went through the back window of the suburban.
My dad did that when he bought me my first snowmobile back in the day, a Yamaha Sno-scoot. I was in the back seat of the Suburban when it came through the window! 
Wife has a new air fryer. She turns the timer on, but forgets to plug it in. Few times waited 15min for COLD food
I was having a couple cold ones with friends one evening. One of the party liked his chew. He set his spit cup down next to another guys beer mug. I don’t have to tell what happened next.
Had my toothbrush in hand but was thinking q-tip. Stuck the toothbrush in my ear!
My wife told me last night that I don’t complement her very much anymore. I said that’s not true. I tell you all the time how beautiful your friends are.
One day I might learn when not to joke around.
I did a stupid thing today and wondered how many of the rest of you occasionally do stupid things and what they might be.
Me: held the wrong end of the staple gun and stapled my hand.
Guilty here.
Was on an elevator in downtown Mpls today. Stopped at a floor and a woman got on and as we went down several floors she said – “what am I doing here? I meant to go to the bathroom not the elevator?!?”
I said I’m about half done with my Diet Coke can if you can keep it to 6 ounces or less!
Was on an elevator in downtown Mpls today. Stopped at a floor and a woman got on and as we went down several floors she said – “what am I doing here? I meant to go to the bathroom not the elevator?!?”
I said I’m about half done with my Diet Coke can if you can keep it to 6 ounces or less!
Ha ha ha ha that is hilarious. How did that play out 
<div class=”d4p-bbt-quote-title”>FryDog62 wrote:</div>
Was on an elevator in downtown Mpls today. Stopped at a floor and a woman got on and as we went down several floors she said – “what am I doing here? I meant to go to the bathroom not the elevator?!?”I said I’m about half done with my Diet Coke can if you can keep it to 6 ounces or less!
Ha ha ha ha that is hilarious. How did that play out
Can overflowed
So last night about 8 p.m. the wife and i were watching tv, all the windows were open and a nice breeze coming through the living room. And then the house started to smell like smoke, i went out the back door to see who was burning what since you need a burn permit this time of year, didn’t see any smoke or smell much, so i came back in and continued watching My 600lb life ( keep in mind i’m banned from the remote sometimes). So after a while my wife says, who in the hell would be burning something this time of night, and i responded its “probably the jackasses down the hill burning their trash”, and she says “no it smells more like an electrical fire or plastic burning”. So she gets up,opens the front door and looks out, and yells, “the garage is on fire its coming from the garage”. So i flew off the couch, hurdled the coffee table and ran to open the garage door expecting the worst.
Low and behold, it was one of her 4ft flower pots that sit on each side of the garage on fire and smoldering. I then remembered i put my cigarette out in it 2-1/2 hrs earlier. Who in the hell would ever think potting soil was flammable.So after being called every stupid name in the book, and 5 gallons of water putting out the fire, i realized i at least saved myself the ass-chewing in 3 weeks when she found the butt while planting flowers.On a positive note she did say “I’ve never seen you move that fast in 20+ years, and my tough guy response was ” i was just getting out of he house since i knew it was on fire”
Potting soil is actually incredibly flammable and often will ignite even if damp. Lost a deck many years ago because my mom put a cigarette out. Took 4 or more hours and some wind.
I tried to drive on a groomed snowmobile trail this winter thinking it was a frontage road. That didn’t end well.
I didn’t move South after last year’s April blizzard… because it would never happen again…
According to Facebook, it snowed 6 years ago around this time too. No thanks.
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