Oh Bubbles

I received a small talkin’ to at work today about how a coworker perceives me to be unapproachable. Based on an interaction this morning before I was even punched on the time clock where he made a request (the request is within my normal duties, of course, but I literally had just walked in the door) and my simple (yet terse) reply was “Okay”. Apparently he must not have heard my reply, and later in the day he asked the owner of the company to send me something for formatting rather than doing it himself, thinking the owner would get a better response from me, which prompted the talkin’ to. Which revolved around the fact that I’m not warm and welcoming and it is part of my job to be so (or feign those qualities) and that I need to be more approachable. It’s unfair to ask me to correct my actions based of the misinterpretation of someone else. I frankly said the coworker shouldn’t be so sensitive to my terse demeanor regarding a request that didn’t require any clarification or further discussion. Long rant short – I have complete empathy for those who get accused – whether it’s accused of harassment or sexual misconduct or other BS – the bureaucratic way to deal with that is apparently to take some kind of action even though the accuser might be totally off base. It’s hard to defend my standofishness (is that a word?) while being defensive about the fact that I did nothing wrong, and this coworker and I have had no issues or awkwardness in the nearly 7 years we’ve been working together. It’s prejudicial really – my terseness and matter-of-fact attitude would seem normal if I was a man. But as a young woman, I’m supposed to be bubbly and cheery no matter the situation. $%#@ that. I’m trying to work here and I value efficiency over bubbliness. Incidentally, trying saying the word “bubbles” in an angry tone… it’s hard to do!

It’s because in this state no one can handle confrontation. If they have an issue with something you did (or thought you did) they don’t do the normal thing and come to you to clarify. They go right to the superiors because they are too chicken $@%& to be an adult and do it themselves. I’ve had this happen to me at work as well and it’s one of my biggest pet peeves. Just come talk to me if you have a problem with something. I’m an adult, I can handle it.

Now you’ve got me worked up. HA

Hmm..i could have fun with this being the union thug i am!!!!!

#1……..asking you to do something off the clock…….

#2………..running and tattling to the owner…………..

#3……..tone of voice…….so what??????

#4……..failure to do a proper investigation……….

I’m surprised he even approached you to talk. I would think he would have sent you a e-mail…………..you know, talking is soooooo out of style these days.

And of course now you’re put in the position of having to prove you didn’t do something, which is impossible. The old joke was “guilty until proven innocent”. That’s completely wrong. Now you’re just guilty.

I have adopted the attitude that I will no longer be “reasonable” when confronted with this kind of crap. I get my back up, I deny everything, I throw it right back in their face. I let them know I think they’re doing a lousy job of handling things.

Now you’ve got me worked up too. Of course, I’m your Dad and that’s part of my job description.

Dad

Didn’t say anything to you about posting on a chart forum during work hours? I think you came out pretty good.

Try working in a hospital. The patient could literally say anything and you could have 100 people say otherwise…and you’ll still get reprimanded one way or another.

wormdunker wrote:

Didn’t say anything to you about posting on a chart forum during work hours? I think you came out pretty good.

Office hours vary greatly in today’s workforce. And there’s this great thing called breaks, too.

I have the same issues at work. Being a supervisor/worker in the construction field isn’t easy either. I had to go to a class on how to treat and talk to millennials. Not that I’m real rude or a a$$, but I guess that’s how I come off in the work place

Bearcat89 wrote:

I have the same issues at work. Being a supervisor/worker in the construction field isn’t easy either. I had to go to a class on how to treat and talk to millennials. Not that I’m real rude or a a$$, but I guess that’s how I come off in the work place

your not the lone ranger I did too!! And really it’s not that bearcat, it’s more, well ok maybe it is!

Ha ha maybe I do come off a little rude and like a a$$, but if they would just get to work and do a job then i wouldn’t have anything to bark at

ClownColor wrote:

Try working in a hospital. The patient could literally say anything and you could have 100 people say otherwise…and you’ll still get reprimanded one way or another.

Yep, that’s where I am as well……Might as well be customer service.

Bearcat89 wrote:

Ha ha maybe I do come off a little rude and like a a$$, but if they would just get to work and do a job then i wouldn’t have anything to bark at

I was always taught “a day pay for a days work” I applied that to myself AND my co-workers. I had a guy complain to my supervisor that I was picking on him. My supervisor’s response; “Nope, Dave treats everyone that way”.

A few years later, I was called into “human resources” for a bit of “training”. No longer could I tell a new hire how to do a task, I could only “suggest” how it should be done.

Huntindave wrote:

<div class=”d4p-bbt-quote-title”>Bearcat89 wrote:</div>
Ha ha maybe I do come off a little rude and like a a$$, but if they would just get to work and do a job then i wouldn’t have anything to bark at

I was always taught “a day pay for a days work” I applied that to myself AND my co-workers. I had a guy complain to my supervisor that I was picking on him. My supervisor’s response; “Nope, Dave treats everyone that way”.

A few years later, I was called into “human resources” for a bit of “training”. No longer could I tell a new hire how to do a task, I could only “suggest” how it should be done.

welcome to the millennium world. Pretty much sums up what I learned in that training. I’d also venture to bet bearcat will say the same thing.

Also I am currently dealing with 2 employer groups trying to get them to do sensitivity/ harrassment training. They just don’t get it.

When I saw the title of this thread I was absolutely sure this was about Trailer Park Boys.

Here you go.

About sums me up until I’m on my second cup of coffee.

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Tomorrow at work…

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I am retired now, but when I was working, these new guy’s and their damm phones,told many of them your here to work, they just don’t get it.
Everybody is so damm sensitive, glad I am gone.

I’m about 5 years north of being a millennial. I have managed a lot of them and have quite a few on my current team. I think the generational thing is a bit overplayed and overgeneralized but there are differences.

They are now the largest demographic in the workforce so you have to take that into account. However, regardless of age, background, etc., hard work and being a good coworker and person are what matters.

If you are a manager, the golden rule matters….treat others as they would like to be treated. I don’t understand why some in management don’t understand that.

Bottom line, most of us work to live not live to work so don’t let it get you down.

Thank goodness you did not grumble, burp and fart…that may have been a written reprimand . Hang in there!

Lol, thanks for the fun responses, guys. It’s an odd world we live in these days. I’ve been with my company 13 years with little issues about my “attitude” and this now being an issue with newer staff I can’t help but wonder if the good ol’ days are gone. I’m glad I can always head to the garage and BS with the maintenance guys. I’ve always felt more at home and welcome there than in my office anyway. Cheers to the guys who keep it real.

If I was a millennial, I’d say OMG! That sally that tattled needs to grow up. Unfortunately that is no longer the world we live in. Don’t let it get you down Sharon, it’s only playing into their game. “Rub some dirt on it and get back in there”

Bearcat89 wrote:

I have the same issues at work. Being a supervisor/worker in the construction field isn’t easy either. I had to go to a class on how to treat and talk to millennials. Not that I’m real rude or a a$$, but I guess that’s how I come off in the work place

I told a millenial a week ago to quit running his mouth, put away the cell phone, and get back to work. The same employee had complained twice the previous week he couldn’t get his work done, there were too many people interrupting him, yet there he was talking and playing with his phone for an hour. He went home crying because I was picking on him. Funny how that works.

Art Green wrote:

I told a millenia

Yes, I’m sure it’s a millennial problem.

It’s funny how the conversation steered in the direction of blaming millennials. Believe it or not, everyone I am referring to in my OP is older than a millennial. And if you define millennial by anyone who is born between 1981 and 1996, well, I fall into that category. (Though it’s on the older end of those dates.) While I do think there are generational differences to consider in the workplace, they are over-hyped and don’t always contribute to as much of the uproar as people assume.

This is where I’m at too. I had gotten a “talking too” by my regional vice president a few weeks back. Apparently a guy in my St. Luis office complained that he felt that I treated him like an idiot. During this conversation with the regional vice president, I said to him “This whole conversation revolved around the district IS/Business Process person not knowing how to write an if statement in excel”. “I can show you in his job description where proficiency in excel is a job requirement if you’d like. All I said was “you might want to sign up for the excel classes soon””

Moral of the story was, me trying to point an underqualified person in the right direction to become qualified, was mean. I guess as a regional manager of development, it’s now my job to write excel formulas for somebody who doesn’t meet the criteria of their own job, and tell them it’s sunshine and rainbows in the process.

Sharon wrote:

It’s funny how the conversation steered in the direction of blaming millennials. Believe it or not, everyone I am referring to in my OP is older than a millennial. And if you define millennial by anyone who is born between 1981 and 1996, well, I fall into that category. (Though it’s on the older end of those dates.) While I do think there are generational differences to consider in the workplace, they are over-hyped and don’t always contribute to as much of the uproar as people assume.

If we brought back spanking we wouldn’t have these issues.
Seriously!

Spanking at work?? Boy that depends on how cute your coworkers are.