I’ve played and coached sports at a fairly high level, and have made a lot of friends along the way with connections to others as well.
Here’s what I have noticed.
There are “elite” programs that are out to take your money and take advantage of you. You pay xxx amount of money to participate, and it is pretty much a year round commitment, even taking away from (what I think should be your #1 priority) your school sport. Whether that is basketball, hockey, baseball, volleyball, gymnastics, etc. They are more so participating in local or regional tournaments. 95% of the programs that are “ruining” sports fall into this category.
There are “elite” programs out there that are truly committed to the athlete and have the proper connections to get you to the next level and fulfil your goals – usually a college player, or a professional player. A lot of these programs are difficult to get onto the team and they are not looking for your money. Lots of them have sponsors, travel the country, and have very little if any financial commitment from the players/families.
What I have noticed is that athletes that truly want to specialize and commit to being the best, pushed by the best (whether that is fellow players, coaches, or their own parents) will succeed. Anybody that does not want that, is going to get burnt out and no longer have fun – and that is largely on the parents because they have pushed them to try and relive their glory days through them.
Friends I have in the NFL were all multi-sport athletes in high school, very raw talent, that coaches were able to mold into what was needed. They all worked extremely hard at their craft, and they were also very very smart in the classroom. I have a few friends that have spent a short amount of time in the NBA and bouncing around other leagues, they were all one sport athletes that specialized in basketball from a young age and they were more than dedicated to it. There was no parents pushing them, it was them trying to get into the gyms at 6:00am or 10:00pm every day, dribbling to and from school, doing things that nobody else wanted to do. The few friends I have that have made it professionally in baseball, whether A or MLB, were multi sport athletes with little baseball specializing until end of high school or college.
If you want your kid to be successful:
1. Make sure it remains fun for them and they really want it, and that is about it.
Other things:
2. Take a step back as a parent and don’t push them in any direction, but do be involved to the point of you needing to make sacrifices for them – driving to practices, financial support, etc.
3. Don’t relive your glory days through them.
4. Don’t talk negative about fellow teammates, coaches, parents, players, etc.
The top players I have seen are all great in the classroom, are getting up early to workout on their own because they want to, are always having fun in practice and games, are coachable, never let the negatives get them too down and never let the positives get them too high.
