I guess BigWerm you folks work differently than many here. We dont find a need to sign a contract to define said ground rules about what can and cannot be done. We EXPECT them to ask permission first.
Its one thing to use like pool toys or the like and quite another a piece of off road equipment or a boat.
I guess BigWerm you folks work differently than many here. We dont find a need to sign a contract to define said ground rules about what can and cannot be done. We EXPECT them to ask permission first.
Dude, can you try reading the words that I am typing? Feel like that might help you understand the discussion here, and I’m not sure how what I’m writing is apparently so confusing. I never said permission shouldn’t be granted first, in fact I said numerous times permission NEEDS to be granted. All I’m saying is once you give permission to use something it’s not unreasonable for that person to continue to think they have permission to use it.
I wouldn’t put myself in a position for them to come over and ruin my stuff. If I did give them the opportunity and they ruined something I wouldn’t blame them, I’d blame myself for giving them the opportunity. Or if they did it despite what I had communicated with them, then I’d have no problem confronting them
On the front end, he should have established if they can use the ATV’s or not. If you let a kid or irresponsible brother, use an ATV and then are upset they beat on it, that’s your own fault. Learn from it and move on. If you didn’t give them permission and they did it anyway, figure out what makes you whole, ask for it and learn to never leave them with access to any of your stuff again.
Depends on the history, if I had told them they were not allowed to drive without my permission, then I’d read them the riot act and discuss monetary compensation if I thought that would make it right. If I had given them permission to use the 4 wheelers previously and it was established that was fine, then that’s your/my own fault for not telling them not to now.
The way it’s always worked at our family cabins, is ground rules are set and that is the expectation moving forward. You can or can’t use XYZ equipment, and once you are allowed to use it, it’s not expected that every time you want to use it moving forward you need to check in with the owner.
@CaptainMusky maybe you missed these in all my previous posts, so I consolidated them down for you into one. Hope this helps bud! 
Bigwerm, you state “ask permission” but the examples you all provided above make it clear that “On the front end, he should have established if they can use the ATV’s or not.” so where in that does it say they need to ask permission? It implies that YOU tell them what they can and cannot do and its not based on whether they ask or not? Comprende?
Bigwerm, you state “ask permission” but the examples you all provided above make it clear that “On the front end, he should have established if they can use the ATV’s or not.” so where in that does it say they need to ask permission? It implies that YOU tell them what they can and cannot do and its not based on whether they ask or not? Comprende?
Because we are talking about things from Norsky, the owner of the ATV’s, perspective. He can’t ask permission from himself. FWIW I never said “ask permission” for that reason, I said GRANT PERMISSION, like the owner of stuff is capable of doing. Context is important, and apparently difficult to understand. ¿Por qué no comprendes?
I think some of you are more upset than the OP. 
Might be time for all to move along and let the OP decide what he is going to do about.
Although I am enjoying the banter counting down the hours till I can get out of dodge and go fishing and rip around at the family cabin on some wheelers.
You guys need to calm down. The only thing worth bickering about before this holiday weekend is why Busch Light made peach and not apple again this year.
This one is easy. Since I’m the favorite son, I’d tell my mom what happened and she’d kick his ass for me.
The traffic on hwy 101 heading north into Elk River is backed up all the way to 94 in Rogers. That’s 7 miles. Just thought I’d put that out there. 
This one is easy. Since I’m the favorite son, I’d tell my mom what happened and she’d kick his ass for me.
Good play matt. I like that. It wouldn’t work in my family because my sister would be me to it
Might be time for all to move along and let the OP decide what he is going to do about.
But I just broke out Google translator!
Anyway I can’t wait to head north tomorrow and ask my parents for permission to use everything at the cabin! I’m talking grills, boats, filet knives, atv’s, the popcorn bowl, vehicles, ketchup, the bed before I go to sleep, want to make sure they know I was raised right!!!! 
What bc said
That’s called RESPECT. if there is no respect, then there is no relationship.
Be careful what you eat and drink cause you were forgetting to ask about potty privilege.
To me this isn’t about the ATVs or the money. It sounds like you and your bro are just two totally different people. That doesn’t mean you can’t have a relationship, but it might mean it’s time to accept that there are certain scenarios where it’s best you guys remain separate. You could sit him down and try to talk it out and explain your perspective but to me it sounds about 99% that he would only react negatively. Just doesn’t seem like the kinda dude who is likely to be like, “ya know what bro, you’re right. How can I make it good?”
Couple additional thoughts… family is important but don’t let it be an excuse for allowing yourself to be taken advantage of. It’s sad when siblings can’t get along but not uncommon. Do you know how many awful fights could have been avoided if two brothers were just honest enough with one another to admit they don’t really make good friends? Sometimes some distance is the ticket.
Anyway I can’t wait to head north tomorrow and ask my parents for permission to use everything at the cabin! I’m talking grills, boats, filet knives, atv’s, the popcorn bowl, vehicles, ketchup, the bed before I go to sleep, want to make sure they know I was raised right!!!!
Jumping right off the deep end again go for but wear a life jacket lol
Growing up brother and I had fights/arguments after a while I would say sorry let’s move forward EVEN when it was his fault.
The word sorry has never been spoken by him.
I haven’t talked to that A-hole in years and could give a rats ass if I ever see him again.
Don’t care who it is, if there an A-hole I have zero time for them.
You guys don’t even know how old the kid is? And some of you are saying punish the kid? As far as the kid knew maybe they had permission. You simply don’t know enough about the whole story to be spouting off like this.
I have zero issue with confrontation. In fact I enjoy it on occasion. But it’s hard to replace family. Get your priorities right or at least know the whole story first.
Growing up brother and I had fights/arguments after a while I would say sorry let’s move forward EVEN when it was his fault.
The word sorry has never been spoken by him.
I haven’t talked to that A-hole in years and could give a rats ass if I ever see him again.
Don’t care who it is, if there an A-hole I have zero time for them.
yup 2nd that
You guys don’t even know how old the kid is? And some of you are saying punish the kid? As far as the kid knew maybe they had permission. You simply don’t know enough about the whole story to be spouting off like this.
I have zero issue with confrontation. In fact I enjoy it on occasion. But it’s hard to replace family. Get your priorities right or at least know the whole story first.
Old enough to go 60 plus on the wheeler is old enough for a ass chewing. Maybe dad doesn’t teach respect, then that’s when the uncle does. I’m a a hole maybe. Maybe he is falling victim 2nd hand or maybe he will understand
Old enough to go 60 plus on the wheeler is old enough for an ass chewing. Maybe dad doesn’t teach respect, then that’s when the uncle does. I’m a a hole maybe. Maybe he is falling victim 2nd hand or maybe he will understand
How the f/ck do you know if the kid thought they had permission or not???
And you are saying you’d slap them both and never invite back and chew them out?
It certainly sounds like the brother is in the wrong but guarantee there is more to the story.
Man no wonder the world is so screwed up. It takes two to tango. There is virtually zero chance all the guys on here disowning family members are all totally in the right and their siblings are all the bad guys.
How the f/ck do you know if the kid thought they had permission or not???
And you are saying you’d slap them both and never invite back and chew them out?
It certainly sounds like the brother is in the wrong but guarantee there is more to the story.
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If they didn’t apologize, then yup. Like I said the kid might get a little heat because of his dad. But u bet he will know better next time. Again a ass chewing isn’t a big deal. No need to get so fired up my guy.
I understand family. Instead of starting an argument I would say to the brother, geez, I really don’t mind if you used my ATV but I sure wished you would have asked first, then I could have told you about the tires, etc, etc. Because they are not supposed to be rode on Asphalt the tires are ruined, even from the short ride. I tell you what, I’ll split it with you because you didn’t ask so I could have warned you of the issue. Shame on me for leaving the keys in the ignition, shame on you for taking them without understanding the nuances. In fact you can have you half of the tires, maybe you can get something on Craigslist. How do you want to work this out as I want to order the tires tomorrow. Put the ball in his court.
If they didn’t apologize, then yup. Like I said the kid might get a little heat because of his dad. But u bet he will know better next time. Again a ass chewing isn’t a big deal. No need to get so fired up my guy.
If the kid honestly thought they had permission, there is nothing he needs to apologize for. The dad (brother) a different story.
Sorry but I don’t like when kids get chewed out for no reason. I’d rather see kids get built up than torn down.
I may have missed it but he just said “my brother and his son.” We could be talking about a 30yr old or a 13 year old son here?
<div class=”d4p-bbt-quote-title”>Bearcat89 wrote:</div>
If they didn’t apologize, then yup. Like I said the kid might get a little heat because of his dad. But u bet he will know better next time. Again a ass chewing isn’t a big deal. No need to get so fired up my guy.If the kid honestly thought they had permission, there is nothing he needs to apologize for. The dad (brother) a different story.
Sorry but I don’t like when kids get chewed out for no reason. I’d rather see kids get built up than torn down.
No need to be sorry, I didn’t ask.
Communicating effectively LOL
Simply answer don’t ask a question online that you know there will be a thousand answers too.
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