Driving down the highway on our way down to the hunting land. During the trip we are talking and the subject of it being a full moon or not for the weekend came up. I told him it wasnt going to be a full moon for a couple more weeks.
Heading EAST on the highway and just about to camp the sun broke the tree line and a comment came from the truck, “You dumb#$@, I thought you said it wasnt suppose to be a full moon for a couple of weeks.”
I still laugh about that one!!
Bear Claw Chris Lapp: Full time night woman? I never could find no tracks on a woman’s heart. I packed me a squaw for ten year, Pilgrim. Cheyenne, she were, and the meanest b!^@& that ever balled for beads. I lodge-poled her at Deadwood Creek, and traded her for a Hawken gun. But don’t get me wrong; I loves the womens, I surely do. But I swear, a woman’s breast is the hardest rock that the Almighty ever made on this earth, and I can find no sign on it.
I’ve always like when i get in from Duck hunting and at the boat landing people will pull up and ask if “we’ve caught any” 
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Bear Claw Chris Lapp: Full time night woman? I never could find no tracks on a woman’s heart. I packed me a squaw for ten year, Pilgrim. Cheyenne, she were, and the meanest b!^@& that ever balled for beads. I lodge-poled her at Deadwood Creek, and traded her for a Hawken gun. But don’t get me wrong; I loves the womens, I surely do. But I swear, a woman’s breast is the hardest rock that the Almighty ever made on this earth, and I can find no sign on it.
Great character 
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I’ve always like when i get in from Duck hunting and at the boat landing people will pull up and ask if “we’ve caught any”
I like fishing at Mill Ruins in the spring and people are constantly asking if I keep or eat the fish I catch there. I need to think of a good come back. Down there maybe just, “Absolutely, I do”, would work.
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I like fishing at Mill Ruins in the spring and people are constantly asking if I keep or eat the fish I catch there. I need to think of a good come back. Down there maybe just, “Absolutely, I do”, would work.
Any time I fish Mill Ruins, or any other spot on the river in the city, the questions are exactly the same from everyone:
“Catching anything?”
“What do you normally catch here?”
“What’s the biggest one you’ve caught?”
“Do you eat them?”
The best, though, was when a lady who was standing about 30 feet from me asked what kind of dog was sitting next to me. As there was no dog near me, I had to figure out what she was seeing. “Um… That’s my backpack.”
In keeping with the theme of the thread, though, I’d have to say that my favorite quote was from my Grandpa, as my cousins and I were getting ready to go fishing. My cousin said something about how his socks didn’t match, and Grandpa said, “Ah, he!!. This ain’t a dang fashion show. The fish don’t care what you’re wearing.”
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Bear Claw Chris Lapp: Full time night woman? I never could find no tracks on a woman’s heart. I packed me a squaw for ten year, Pilgrim. Cheyenne, she were, and the meanest b!^@& that ever balled for beads. I lodge-poled her at Deadwood Creek, and traded her for a Hawken gun. But don’t get me wrong; I loves the womens, I surely do. But I swear, a woman’s breast is the hardest rock that the Almighty ever made on this earth, and I can find no sign on it.
Just watched that show the other day.
“He has a big boat so he must know what he is doing.” This is usually reserved for the guys cruising between the buoys and shore on the river.
Hawk. Goin’ for the Musselshell. Take me a week’s ridin’, and he’ll be there in… hell, he’s there already.
Daniel Boone “I have never been lost, but I will admit to being confused for several weeks.”
Davy Crockett “I would rather be beaten, and be a man, than to be elected and be a little puppy dog.” “I would rather be politically dead than hypocritically immortalized.”
I was in a car accident where I cut my face up pretty bad.
So a few days later a friend and I are on a grouse hunting trip,dressed in our camo, we stopped for breakfast after the morning hunt.
The customers that were there could not stop staring at the the site of my scrapes.So we finish eating, I go in the restroom and wash up, my friend picks up the bill and pays at the register, as I came out of the restrooms I walked up to the register to pick up a pack of gum and the owner is looking at me as though he had seen a ghost.
So I walk out to the truck where my Friend is waiting and laughing his A off,dumbfounded, I ask what was going on.
So he tells me that the owners and waitresses asked him what had happpened to my face.
and the smart ash tells them that, we just had a hunting accident.
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I was in a car accident where I cut my face up pretty bad.
So a few days later a friend and I are on a grouse hunting trip,dressed in our camo, we stopped for breakfast after the morning hunt.The customers that were there could not stop staring at the the site of my scrapes.So we finish eating, I go in the restroom and wash up, my friend picks up the bill and pays at the register, as I came out of the restrooms I walked up to the register to pick up a pack of gum and the owner is looking at me as though he had seen a ghost.
So I walk out to the truck where my Friend is waiting and laughing his A off,dumbfounded, I ask what was going on.
So he tells me that the owners and waitresses asked him what had happpened to my face.
and the smart ash tells them that, we just had a hunting accident.
Jeff, I always wondered why you were so ugly, now I know! Ha!, just kidding. Looking foward to the opener trip on Vermilion.
Ah the good son!!!!!
Ted is that you? 
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attractive and a pretty good grouse hunter – Must have been a dream – A good one at that !!!!
Headed into a NW wind on Mille Lacs one opener, my Wetliner was inhaling massive gallons of spray. My partner turned to me and says, “We’re doing it Harry, We’re really doing it!”
One time this closet cross dresser I know said I looked like the unibomber in an ice fishing pic. Good times.
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Does everything have to be a bad joke?
Mostly an inside joke. 
Not so much inside to those that pay attention to all of the popular forums.
similar to Jeff’s post, last weekend my son, who is 3, was fishing with me and when I went to organize before leaving, I said to him, “where’s daddy’s fish?” his reply was, “I put them in the water to swim dad!”
The other one is put on your shanty panties we’re going ice fishing!
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Ah the good son!!!!!
Ted is that you?
Nope, not Teddy, I could never fill those shoes!
Speaking of quotes, I was fishing the opener on Vermilion a few years back when my best friend and I took his dad’s new walleye boat out. We were moving along the lake at a pretty fast clip when the brand new top of the line Minnekota trolling motor came out of its mount, stood up, and went straight down to the water at somewhere around 40-50 mph(luckily I was co-pilot and wasn’t driving, but unfortunately will always be tied to this disaster). The trolling motor shaft snapped in two and the lower half with the prop motor whipped back and punched a nice hole right through the fiberglass hull. It was a slow ride and a long walk back to his dad’s cabin at the resort. We walked in with both our heads hanging around our ankles and my buddy Cory says to his dad with the shakiest voice ever, “Dad, we #@!$%& up the boat pretty bad”. We proceeded to tell him what happened and when it was all done, his dad looks at all the other guys in the cabin, shakes his head, looks back at Cory and says, “I love you son. I really do.”
Thats when Teddy became “The good son”.
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