From one of my favorite Dramas, “River Runs Through It”……. He who does not know how to catch a fish should not be allowed to disgrase a fish by catching it!…. The lord blessed us all today, but he was particularly good to me!.. The Preacher 
I was flipping thru the channels last night and on Comedy Central they were showing “Blue Collar Comedy Tour – The movie” Enough one liners and funny stories to last a long time. Jeff Foxworthy, Ron White, Bill Engvall and Larry the Cable guy. It’s an hour and 45 minutes of one funny story or one liner after another.
That show is a RIOT!!!! I have watched about 6 times now. I taped it too. 
That story Ron White tells about getting kicked out of a bar in New York is a Classic….. Ron “Tater” White! lol His son.. “Tatertot”.
It’s definately worth watching. 
I think Ron White steals the show. Funny stuff. I bought the CD on-line http://bluecollarcomedytour.warnerbros.com/
I think one of those should be Army Of Darkness. If you haven’t seen it, there are CLASSIC corny one liners in it garaunteed to get a laugh outta ya! Now THAT’S funny! 
I don’t know how i missed this thread, but for anyone who works in an office……the movie OFFICE SPACE has plenty of GREAT one-liners…
“ummm…….yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh”
My number one lines:
“Sh##’ll buff out” (referring to the rust on his car)
Joe Dirt
Tommy Boy
Richard: “What number did you call?”
Tommy: “…2..3..1..9er..?”
Richard: “Did I catch a 9er in there? Were you calling from a wallkie talkie?”
Tommy: “No, it was cordless.”
Dumb and Dumber
Jim Carey looks down at the briefcase and says “Oh here’s her name right here, Samsonite. I knew it started with an S.”
Jeff Daniels approaches Mary who is standing next to two owls in a cage- “Nice set of hooters you got there.”
Jeff Daniels “We’ve been working on breeding a Bulldog and a Shitzui…yeah…we call it a Bullshit.”
Blazing Saddles:
Johnson – “I think he said the Sheriff is near.”
Gabby Johnson – “No dang blabbin dangint. I said the Sheriff is a Ni—BONG!!!!”
Your So Drunk your probably seeing double, Well i got two guns one for the each of ya’s! Doc Holliday…Tombstone
When the Jimmer wakes up and finds Rueben SOady in between his legs….(jimmer says) Well that would explain the dream..
ESCANABA in Da Moonlight…that whole movie should be on here!!! a guarenteed must see for all u outdoorsmen
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I was flipping thru the channels last night and on Comedy Central they were showing “Blue Collar Comedy Tour – The movie” Enough one liners and funny stories to last a long time. Jeff Foxworthy, Ron White, Bill Engvall and Larry the Cable guy. It’s an hour and 45 minutes of one funny story or one liner after another.
Get ‘er done. That’s right.
Gator Hunter
From that same guy. when he’s talking about taking the kids to WalMart just so’s you can whoop em’! HA!!! 
well ok, I have to add my 2 cents worth to this post now.
here goes.
from slapshot2,
stephan baldwin finds out that the team is sold ” what the #@@$ do they know about hockey”
also from slapshot “I want to play oldtime hockey, like eddie shore, gordie howe, GORDIE!!!!!”
from Major Payne ” is there no place in this man’s military for a highly skilled killing machine?”
“rise out of the ground my little brussel sprouts, because tommarow we start to have fun!”
from men in black, “the only problem with this is, I make this look good.”
Best Line:
“Get Busy Livin’…or Get Busy Dyin'” – The Shawshank Redemption
Cheesiest Line:
“Nobody puts Baby in a corner” – Dirty Dancing
“Diamonds…..That’ll shut her up.” Ron White, The Blue Collar Comedy Tour
Gator Hunter
Here’s one of my favorites.
Someone’s gotta go back and get a sh__load of dimes!
Quote:
Here’s one of my favorites.
Someone’s gotta go back and get a sh__load of dimes!
What movie is that from?? 
Gator Hunter
Blazing Saddles Gator…………..Blazing Saddles! 
Blazing Saddles indeed!!
“The Lapetomaine(sp?) thruway!?!?? What’ll that [censored] think of next.”
Nothing like a toll booth in the middle of an open prairie. Anybody else notice this thread won’t die. 
Oh.. 
Gator Hunter
BRAVEHEART — “We’ll build spears, as long as men.” “That long? Well, some men are longer than others.” “Your mother’s been telling stories about me again!”
OLD SCHOOL — “Honey, ya think KFC’s still open?”
— “We’re goin streakin!!! To the quad and the gymnasium. You can come too! Bring your green hat!”
— “I promised my wife I wouldn’t drink tonight. We’ve actually got a pretty busy day planned. We’re gonna hit bed, bath and beyond and check out some of the furniture and then maybe make it to home depot.. I don’t know if we’ll have time!”
— “Once it hits your lips, its so good!”
— “There’s my wife. Always smiling. Hi honey. Judging, watching… look at the baby, look at the baby.”
— “Earmuffs!”
Alright, you guys got me too, here’s a few, I didn’t see in here.
“Because you are a fat discusting pig, that is correct” Drill Sargeant in Full Metal Jacket after finding the jelly doughnut in the footlocker
“This one time at band camp” American Pie
“Right here Dude” Spicoli to the pizza guy in Fast Times at Ridgemont High
“Clint Eastwood. I fu**ed him–ohhhhh” Andrew Dice Clay in The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (talk about one liners)
“Get in my belly” Fat Bast*rd to Mini-Me in Austin Powers
“Drop your co**s, and grab your socks” Clint Eastwood in Heartbreak Ridge
Dumb & Dumber
“Those Skis’ your”
“Yep”
“Both of ’em”
“Whats the soup dejour”
“Its the soup of the day”
“MMMMMM, that sounds good, I think I’ll try that”
“Oh, They have the internet on computers now!”
-Homer Simpson 
BRAVEHEART- “You have bleed with Wallace, now bleed with me.”
I almost cried at that part 
Here goes my shot at this. Then can we get back to fishing talk?
From Kingpin. The Amish guys comment about anouther guys hot girl freind strutting by.
“Jokes on him. With narrow hips like that she is only going to be good for 5 or 6 kids”
This puts me on the floor every time. Made the whole movie in one line.
i swear if you guys rip on my thirteen or fourteen more times…. I’m outta here.-baseketball-
Smokey and the Bandit.
There’s no way no way that you came from my loins the first thing i’m going to do when I get home is punch your momma in the mouth.
You sons bitches couldn’t close an umbrella.
Duck or you’ll be talkin out your [censored].
What were dealing with here is a complete lack of respect for the law
you going somewhere meat….about 90 feet… I bought 100 of these golves, one for every base I am going to steal.—major leage
If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball….
Patches O‘Houllihan
DodgeBall
CADDIESHACK: RODNEY DANDERFIELD,
“HAY YOU SCRATCHED MY ANCHOR”
“BET YOU WERE SOMETHING BEFORE ELECTRICITY”
NOT RODNEY BUT
” WANT TO TIE ME UP WITH SOME OF YOUR TIES,TYE ?”
GOOD THREAD KEEP IT GOING, 
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