i have a dilemma

my son is off school next week for spring break, he’s 16yrs old and a junior in high school. my 18yr old daughter goes to school in florida and wants him to come down and visit while he is off school (she has a break from classes) my son has never flown before. she said she would meet him at the airport and make sure he makes his flight home. both kids have shown signs of be respossible.
i’m not sure if i’m real comfortable with this. should i let him go or not?
thanks for your opinions
SLACK

why not he is able to drive why not fly. I flew alone when I was seven to visit family in Florida. You can request a close seat to an attendant if needed.

I don’t know your kids and would never presume to know their maturity level. I would say no. This just seems to be a bad situation potentially. Can you really see your daughter saying no to your son?

Maybe I’m old fashion but I have never seen the sense of allowing high school kids to go to Florida, Mexico and other places alone.

I remember all to well what I was like at that age.

Boy I don’t know. Is he mature for his age? Meaning acts like he’s 16 going on 21? I’m sure the sound of it is exciting to him but I wonder how comfortable he really is with the idea of doing this alone. I guess at 16 I thought i was invincible but I know better now.

There will always be next year to visit sis when they are both a year older!

Is it a direct flight? That would be the only way I’d probably let him go, if he’s truly comfortable with it.

Not in my house! Sounds like a hell of a time though.

What could go wrong at spring break in florida? Im going to be down there from sunday to sunday in Daytona to make sure every one is behaving.

Thats a tough call. You would know them better than any one else.

You only live once and all you can take with you is memories. If you’ve done your job as a parent for 16 years I say let him go…. There’s no better way to prove or disprove if they are responsible then letting them fly out of the nest….. On their own….

Tell them to have fun, act like the mature individuals you raised them to be and call if they need your help… Oh and send lots of money. You can’t go to a movie on 5 bucks like we could in the 60’s….

IMHO – one of the biggest problems in this country is kids no longer are free to roam the way many of us were in the 60’s and 70’s. Cell phones, pagers and GPS’s have destroyed ones ability to learn how to navigate without someone holding their hand….

I’m not a parent yet, but I don’t think I’d let him go. I wouldn’t be too concerned with the flying part as much as the trouble he could get into. I was a pretty good kid, but I did some dumb stuff in my teen years

I am brand new to the whole parenting thing as of about 2 weeks ago so take this for what it is worth.

You know your kids….if they are responsible I would say let him go visit his sister. If not then wait on it.

I also think it is really cool that his sister wants him to come visit.
You only live once….ya gotta make the most of it and it should be really fun for both of them.

I agree with Kurt Turner. We have not only lost our innosence but also our sense of adventure. Times are different now than they were when I was 16. You may trust your son and daughter but can you trust the world around them. It’s a tough call. The only way to remove dobt, is to remove temptation. But then again some of my best memories were in situations like this one. Teenagers will be what they are. All you can do is hope they have there heads screwed on straite and know when to say NO. Talk to him and find out how he feels. Guilt can be a powerful weapon. But just remember ” A stiff penis has no concience.”

KURT,
i completely agree with what your saying and i’ve always given my kids the freedom to experiance life but this one is really testing me.
also i should clarify some things, my daughter does not go to a regular collage she goes to a technical collage and when i stated she had a break what it is is she has online classes this month and does not have to go in to school. she also lives in an apartment in a gated complex. she just wants to take him to some neat places in the orlando area.

Thinking back, I don’t think it is a good idea. But I can tell you, I was allowed alot of freedom growing up and I have alot of good memories from it Then again, my parents did let me go to Kentucky for 8 weeks alone when I was 17 years old…. Fort Knox Basic Training… US Army reserves You know your son and daughter best, if it’s against your better judgement, nobody here should convince you

big G

SLACK – BBShot said it best and I meant to but went off… You know you kids best… Maybe I got lucky but I wanted to make sure my kids were ready to tear the world a new _ss when they were 18 so by the time they reached 16 I was more then ready to test their cocky ways by letting them have a car and a cell phone. If they messed up the car keys sat in my possession. So far it’s worked quite nicely… Only one left out of 4 and he’s 16 and driving….

It’s pretty neat big Sis wants him to visit but also a major concern for the messy world we’ve created. I’m sure they wouldn’t get in trouble but the millions of people around them could create an opportunity???

Have some fun with this… Not many of these parenting opportunities come along. Sit down and become close with both of them.. Lots of things to learn from this whether he goes or stays home…

Good luck!

Here’s a Mom’s point of view. IF your daughter is and has been a responsible young lady, and IF your son is and has been a responsible young man, I would let him go. If either of them has a tendency to take risks or make bad judgment calls, then I’d keep him home this time.
1. The airline will take him from your hand to your daughters, if you set up the flight that way.
2. Be sure you send a power of attorney so that your daughter can sign for his medical needs if there should be an accident or illness of some kind.
3. Impress on each child that this is a big undertaking for each of them…..they are now as responsible for each other as you have been for them all these years. They can still have lots of fun, but always be aware of each others whereabouts and of their surroundings.

I think it would be a trip of a lifetime for both of them. Be sure to send a camera, tell them to take lots of pics together. And of course, they need to check in with you on your schedule, whatever makes you comfortable.

June

Seriously? Have you seen the freaks that hang-out in airports? I fly a lot, I’m 41, and I’m scared in the airports! Give him the money you’d spend on the plane ticket and tell him to stay home and have fun. If he’s like most kids he’ll take the money and run!

Tell them Mom says no.

FDR

Boy, brings me back to some of my finer scholastic moments in college. Great times! I must say that my parents never would have let me go at 16, but I would say, why not? Of course, I’m 25 and single with no kids that I know of. If he wasn’t going to visit his sister, I wouldn’t let him just go, but family is different. Have a ball, get a tan, and let him kick it in the sand.

If your daughter is responsible and level-headed, let him go. There is nothing better than brothers and sisters being each others best friends.
HRG

This is a really tough call. Florida this time of year is really not a safe place period. There are alot of adults that go there to prey on the kids that are there for Spring break. It seems every year there is a new threat to scare the heck out of parents—date rape drugs, gangs, kidnapping and who knows what for new drugs coming down the pike. I guess I am worried as much for your daughter as I am for you son. It sounds like she takes all the right precautions and is very mature for her age. Her brother might give her a reason to be extra cautious since she will be watching out for him too. Bottom line is this—if you think the two of them will actually heed you advice and watch out for each other AND if your son is mature for his age—I say go for it. If you have that gnawing feeling in your gut then go with that and take the time off and take him. You and the kids could have a great time together and then you’ll KNOW they are safe!

NO. WIthout question NO. He can do that kind of thing when he’s 18 and in college if he wants to. Responsibility aside, too many risks with a 16 year old. just my opinion. Buy him a bunch of beer and drink with him in your garage if that’s what he needs.

well I have two girls.. and I let both of them go to Mexico and to Germany respectfully.. They both went with “school” per se’.. but what they did was live with families.. and they saw their teacher like twice during the two weeks..

if this kid is responsible let him go..

and as for airports, with all the security now, YOU HAVE TO HAVE A TICKET just to get out of the main area.. and they don’t allow anyone else to “drop in”..

You know your kid.. if he is stupid.. let stupid stay home.. if he is a good kid.. put him on the plane..

I wish you well in your decision..

This is a tough one. For those that say “times have changed” since they were that age, they are right. Now instead of a phone call to the parents for underage drinking, they get arrested and or a ticket that goes on their record. Colleges look at those records (at least some do) when deciding on admission or scholarships. Back then, two “kids” having a little “fling” and getting caught had to answer to the girls dad. Now it’s rape and you get put on that sexual offenders list for life. The “stupid kid stuff” that we all did when young, is no longer considered “stupid kid stuff”. It is usually treated as a crime! Now that I have scared you and made every parent of a teenager worried , I say, if they have an itinerary, and you trust them, and have had the “adult” talk with them, let him go! Just understand, even good kids have lapses in judgment! Good luck!

i would like to thank all of you for your responses some very good pionts brought up. as i was driving home from work yesterday i gave this a lot of thought and realized that i have always been the parent thats let our kids live life (the wife was always the bad cop) so i asked myself “why now?” so i had a good talk with my son when i got home. He’s going to floida. i do trust my kids (daughter is 18 going on 25 and my son is a responible young man) now i know there are no garenties but you can’t keep them locked in there room for ever. i just have to believe in the job we have done raising them. i’ve always told my kids “don’t worry about WWJD (WHAT WOULD JESUS DO) you need to worry about what dad wants you to do (WDWYTD).
and i think they heard this so much it accually set in. anyway i’m just rambling now.
again thanks.

SLACK

I’m sure they will be fine.

Be sure to warn him of the slimeballs in life.
Be sure he understands never to flash a roll of cash anywhere. Be sure he keeps his money and credit cards in several pockets, never have it all in your wallet when traveling. Seems like stuff everybody knows, but unless you travel many people never think about it.

Hope he has fun!!

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just my opinion. Buy him a bunch of beer and drink with him in your garage if that’s what he needs.

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