Fisher of Men. With a new AUGER!

Well, ok… I am not getting a new Auger yet. But got the wife to agree to it if I do. Here is the ploy:

Auger has been acting up and not starting (have since got it working… hence the reason why I have not gotten one). I have mentioned to the better half how I am in need of a new auger. I have a brand new Fish Trap Yukon, Heater, as well as a few other fishing goodies. I mention to the wife how it would be a waste of money on those things if I can’t fish… since no auger is working. She is not already happy with the money I have spent… so for the last month it has been a resounding “NO”.

So, after church.. there is always a gathering for fellowship in the fellowship hall for coffee and donuts. Me and the pastor get along famously. Always razzing each other with politics and whatnot (he is a liberal pastor… even saw the micheal moore-on movie). Anyway, I call him over to talk. I said to him: You know, weren’t many of Jesus’s diciples’ Fisherman? He said yes. I said “well, I need you to do me a favor… go over there and talk to my wife and tell her I need a new Auger because I am only trying to follow in their footsteps.” Well, he liked that joke quite a bit… so he did. He walked over and told her that I needed a new Auger so I could be more like his diciples and go fishing. Now, although the better half is blonde… she is not dumb and she realized the ploy. But the chuckle got the better of her and on the way home she said I could get one.

Happy Fishing!!!

*Information provided in this post is provided ‘as is’ without warranty or salvation gauranteed of any kind. The User assumes all risks of hellfire and damnation from spouses or higher powers.

Saint Peter the Musky Fisherofmen

After Jesus was resurrected, He appeared a number of times before His disciples before he ascended to Heaven. This particular appearance happened on the Sea of Tiberius and it happened this way:

Simon Peter, Thomas, Nathaniel, James, and John, and two other disciples were together. “I’m going out to fish for muskies” Simon Peter says. The other disciples agreed that this was a good idea. The disciples went out in the boat and caught nothing (The Sea of Tiberius was not well known for muskies).

Early in the morning, Jesus stood on the shore but the disciples did not recognize Him. Jesus calls out to the disciples “Friends, have you boated any muskies?” “No” says the disciples, “but we have had two follows, and James missed one on a depth raider”. Jesus calls out to the disciples again “Tie on a suick and cast over there by that rock pile and you will catch one”. Thomas, the doubtful one, hollers back, “We have thrown everything at that rock and there are no fish there!” Peter, who had not raised a fish yet that day and having an affinity for rock piles, hooks a red and white suick to his leader, runs to the front of the boat, and fires out a cast. After the third tug on the bait, a mighty battle ensues and Peter boats a very respectable 52″ musky.

John, who then recognized the Lord, and upon witnessing this miracle (lets just say that Peter was not the best musky fisherman) exclaims “Jesus Christ that’s a big musky!!!”

Peter, in his gratitude jumps into the water and runs toward Jesus and the other disciples follow dragging along the 52″ musky. Jesus says to the disciples “How’s about holding that fish up for a group photo?” After taking a few pictures, releasing the fish, and breaking bread together, Jesus says to Peter, “Simon Peter, son of John, do you truly love me more than you love musky fishing?”. “Yes Lord” says Peter, “You know that I do”. Jesus says “try some live bait on a quick strike rig, this works great in the fall.”

Again Jesus says, “Simon, son of John, do you truly love me more than you love musky fishing?” Saint Peter answers, “Yes Lord, you know that I do!” Jesus says “Try a shallow invader under overcast skies, they work great when twitched over weeds.”

The third time Jesus says to Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than you love musky fishing?” Despite his recent catch, Peter’s feelings are hurt because Jesus asked this a third time. Not wanting to give up any more good tips on musky fishing though, Peter replies “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you more than I love musky fishing!” Jesus replies, “Don’t quit your day job Peter, Follow Me”

Peter went on to continue the Lord’s work and to spread the Christian faith. He boated many more muskies in his day thanks to the wisdom given to him by the Lord.

… Inspired by a true story (John, chapter 21)

Pete Yake