? for those with a current or past teenager – Others as well.

What age do they start structured chores? My kids all pick up their toys when we’re on their ass about it and my 5 yo (oldest) loves to empty the dishwasher but that seems sketchy.

CaptainMusky wrote:

It takes an act of God to get them to take care of the dishe

X2

The 10 does well w helping out around the house. 15 not so much, 20 during the summers when she’s home is a bum, reason I kicked her out this summer. Spending nights on some couches has helped when she comes back home. I think it’s phenomenal when mom and dad have a shared plan to instill work ethics into their kids.

My daughter began mowing the lawn at the age of 8. Got her first job during the summer at 14. Of couse just because she had a job didn’t mean she was excused from her normal daily jobs around the house. She will be going to college next year and the wife and I feel very good about her making the adjustement since we have taught her everything she needs to know to survive on her own. Grocery shopping, laundry, cooking, etc..

If my wife is away from home for a few days, I’ll usually wash and put away my dishes right after the meal.

tswoboda wrote:

What age do they start structured chores? My kids all pick up their toys when we’re on their ass about it and my 5 yo (oldest) loves to empty the dishwasher but that seems sketchy.

We taught normal clean up, stuff like you couldn’t play with certain stuff till other stuff was picked up and what not since the beginning. We made cleanliness a priority since the beginning. Made the chore list on the fridge as a daily thing at like 6 probably. Obviously a 6 year old isn’t going to have crazy chores. But making the bed and clean room was from 4 or 5 on. And it progresses from there. Now having a 7 and 12 year old the 12 year old is great and doesn’t argue, the 7 yr old only wants to argue and looses her allowance often. Then tells us it’s no fare the 12 year old got his even though he did all his stuff and never argued. I’d say it varies by child but needs to be taught immediately

Heck no, my son does not! Thats MY time….lol.

He does the weed whipping and dog poop removal whilst I mow… and if I get my way, it’ll stay that way.

tswoboda wrote:

What age do they start structured chores?

It does vary with individual abilities but I’ve seen these chore charts before and thought they were helpful.

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I overheard my son tell his buddy once (think he was 10) that if you put up enough of a fight and make it more work to get you to do the chore than it takes for it to be done. I will just do it. This is true with my wife. He will not do anything she ask without a big ordeal. So she just does it instead of fighting with him. When she is not around (she works nights) and it is just him and I. He just does it right away when I ask. He knows no matter how big of a fight he puts up I will hold my ground and he will be doing the chore in the end. Choices also help. Do you want to load the dishwasher or unload the dishwasher?

I sent that chore chart in a group text to the kiddos, my 20 responded with “How to be put in a nursing home 101”

Lil $hit at least makes me lol

Deuces wrote:

I sent that chore chart in a group text to the kiddos, my 20 responded with “How to be put in a nursing home 101”

Lil $hit at least makes me lol

Deuces wrote:

Lil $hit at least makes me lol

Mini you by chance? LOL

Rodwork wrote:

I overheard my son tell his buddy once (think he was 10) that if you put up enough of a fight and make it more work to get you to do the chore than it takes for it to be done. I will just do it.

Rodwork wrote:

Choices also help. Do you want to load the dishwasher or unload the dishwasher?

If I had overheard that 1st statement, He would have never received a choice option. He would be both Loading and unloading the dishwasher for a long time

Bearcat89 wrote:

My 12 year old mows the lawn, picks up dog poop and weed wacks. Kids need chores and structure. Most folks these days baby there kids and it shows out in public.just give them a tablet and your parenting is good, no need to teach work ethic or nothing

100% agree! On all counts.

CaptainMusky wrote:

<div class=”d4p-bbt-quote-title”>Deuces wrote:</div>
Lil $hit at least makes me lol

Mini you by chance? LOL

Yup

I grew up in town and I mowed and shoveled our yards, walks and driveway. I also had several neighbors that had no kids that I did the same for summer and winter. I had a friend who lived on a farm, and I couldn’t wait until haying season so I could spend time with him doing what farm kids did. I was driving full sized farm tractors at the eighth grade. My Mother worked three jobs when I was young and money wasn’t there for an allowance, but I darned well knew what my chores were, and they were done without whining.

I grew up respecting my elders too. None of this lip kids even their parents today.

I mow today and rather find it calming. Snow blowing the same.

Neither of my daughters was allowed to take their drivers test until they could show ME how to change a tire. Run that by most of today’s kids.

fishthumper wrote:

If I had overheard that 1st statement, He would have never received a choice option. He would be both Loading and unloading the dishwasher for a long time

In my house, he would have been doing them by hand and the dishes would have to be CLEAN or he would be doing them over, until they were.

Huntindave wrote:

<div class=”d4p-bbt-quote-title”>fishthumper wrote:</div>
If I had overheard that 1st statement, He would have never received a choice option. He would be both Loading and unloading the dishwasher for a long time

In my house, he would have been doing them by hand and the dishes would have to be CLEAN or he would be doing them over, until they were.

You too?

I hated dishes so much as a kid, that as an adult I never kept more than two plates and two bowls in my cupboard. Even now I mostly use disposable stuff and wash anything I use immediately. I hated it because that was my first job at 14 that wasn’t newspaper delivery or cash for helping neighbors.

I seem to remember mowing the whole fricken neighborhood… and when that was done, the softball field across the road !!! (lived on a lake too, with slope to the water, so not easy mowing !)

My girls are too young for mowing (3.5 and 1). However, the 3 year old has her “work boots” and “work hat” and would mow the county if I let her. She enjoys folding laundry, shoveling snow, pulling weeds, helping cook, mulching, vacuuming (or chasing her 1 year old sister with it).

I don’t think it’s so much about what specific chores or tasks kids are assigned, but rather they understand that in life at all ages there are things you may not love to do, but have to do them to get to the “good” stuff.

Our kids are obviously young, but neither my wife or I had an allowance growing up. There were certain things we did as chores for the intrinsic value (helping at the church, raking neighbors lawn, and son on) and were taught that not every good deed is rewarded. Coming from large rural families pitching in was a necessity not an option.

I used to have between 1 and 20 kids rangeing in age from 17 to 25 work for me. In 30 years I imagine I must have had at least 200 kids work for me.
I could always tell which ones had chores and which ones didn’t.
The kids who never worked at home were usually a bigger problem.
It doesn’t have to be mowing the lawn but it needs to be something that needs to be done when it needs to be done, not when they want to do it.
They also need to be held accountable.
Life skills are really important we had our son doing his own laundry when he was 15, college worked out well for him.
I did have to fire him a couple times and I think he learned from it.

My boys (12 and 15) both mow lawn. When they were younger, I used it as requirement as part of their allowance, but as they get older and more capable, it has just become a task they have to help with. My 15 yr old now has an actual job, and my youngest has a cash gig helping out our former daycare for a day or two a week during the summer – so they they’ve learned that they have to earn their money. Still doesn’t mean they still don’t need a kick-in-the-a$$ now and then

But like others have said, I don’t mind mowing the lawn. It actaully helps me think and prioritize outside projects like landscaping, etc as I walk around my yard for 45 min.

These Threads always make me laugh. Maybe those houses do not have kids of age to mow lawn. We live in a neigh boor hood where the two neigh boor boys go out to a farm daily to do chores. The other neighbors’ kids help with things daily outside. My child is seven and he does daily chores along with helping outside when it is needed. He does things like pick up sticks, shovel snow and other things.
The one family does not expect or get much work out of their kids, and I squarely blame this on parenting. If you set the expectation that kids will do chores, then they will do chores. We as parents have to set these expectations.

Before knocking kids these days drive around a few neighborhoods and you will see kids out playing and helping out and if you do not maybe you’re living in the wrong neighborhood.

I agree with orve4 , the current generation always bags on the younger generation. You think parents born in the 40s weren’t ragging on their teenagers in the late 70s and 80s for having long hair and being lazy ? My neighbor has 3 high school kids , he makes them shovel the elderly couples driveway and walk every snow storm.

midnight wrote:

He then asked me why I always drive with just 12 (one handed)?

Cause you need a free hand for your beer

JEREMY wrote:

Cause you need a free hand for your beer

Hell yea

orve4 wrote:

Before knocking kids these days drive around a few neighborhoods and you will see kids out playing and helping out and if you do not maybe you’re living in the wrong neighborhood.

Once again. My original post was not Knocking todays Kids. It was just a observation. I drive through Lots of neighborhoods these days, and like I said, I see vary few Kids out mowing lawns. Maybe its because like some here have said, Its a task they prefer doing themselves. Just curious, what neighborhood do you live in. Maybe I could take a drive through yours and see that I’m incorrect

We live outside of St.Cloud. I think these parents are the ones to blame not holding these kids responsible to help in these activities. I thank my lucky starts my parents had these expectations of me. My little guy looks forward to helping with chores.

orve4 wrote:

We live outside of St.Cloud. I think these parents are the ones to blame not holding these kids responsible to help in these activities. I thank my lucky starts my parents had these expectations of me. My little guy looks forward to helping with chores.

Then we live in the same area and drive thru many of the the same neighborhoods. I think there is a ever changing style of parenting. Not saying for the better or the worst. Just say its always changing .

I don’t think many people are ragging on kids at all. I made a simple observation that parents these days give kids tablets and that’s there day care, get away from me, quit crying thing. I see it everyday. I’m not very old. 34 to be exact. I rag on lazy parents because they create lazy kids. Spoil a kid rotten and give them no responsibility and they will grow that way. At least that’s what I have noticed. We run through many younger 18 to 20 year old guys in the field. You can tell immediately the way they were raised by the work ethic they show. There is exemptions on all of this of course. Go to a restaurant these days see 20 families. 15 of them will have kids glued to a screen, if not throwing a fit